Frazzled Family Christmas Bingo

FrazzledFAMILYBINGO!Only nine days until daycare starts up again…but who is counting? Merry Christmas everyone!

FRAZZLED FAMILY CHRISTMAS BINGO!

Child meltdown from too much stimulation (or sugar) Eat a sweet while hiding from child Someone gets sick Marital spat Spouse begins shopping (less than 72 hours before xmas)
Last minute Amazon purchase Family drama Spouse insists on watching Bad Santa Christmas ornament gets broken Public meltdown (parent)
Third trip to grocery store in one day Purchase gift for yourself FREE SPACE child is watching TV THANK GOD Store clerk aims to appease child with sticker, fails miserably Countdown until daycare opens (less than 72 hours into holiday break)
humblebrag appears in Facebook feed Visit a creepy mall santa Last minute scramble for caregiver or teacher gift Christmas card envy Unsolicited parenting advice from relative
Public meltdown (child) Buyer’s remorse over annoying toy purchase Run out of (or lose) Scotch tape End up in line at Post Office (despite best efforts) Child steals a cookie

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What would appear on your bingo board? Share in the comments or on Facebook. Cheers!

 

If My Toddler Hosted Parties

Welcome, come in! Please take off your shoes. And your pants. And shirt.

Would you like a bite to eat? Please, follow me to the kitchen. I have pulled a chair up to the freezer door. Would you like a poggissle? I have red, purple, and orange.

No. You CAN’T HAVE THE RED. THAT’S MY RED!

I’m glad we worked that out. Please, have a seat in the living room.

Perhaps you would enjoy sitting over here in the dog kennel? I find it to be quite comfortable.

Perhaps you would enjoy sitting over here in the dog kennel? I find it to be quite comfortable.

Let’s watch TV. Here is Kate and Mim-Mim. What, the freaky purple alien rabbit scares you? I don’t care. This is the only show I watch. I watch it every morning and every night.

My mother is telling me that it is time for some food. If you are like me you won’t need any. However I do find it helpful for getting food to feed to the dog.

What’s that, you want your own plate? And a chair to sit in? Oh, that won’t be necessary! We can all sit on my mother’s lap. And eat off of her plate. And steal ice from her beverage.

What’s that, you want your own plate? And a chair to sit in? Oh, that won’t be necessary! We can all sit on my mother’s lap. And eat off of her plate. And steal ice from her beverage.

Well, this is boring. Let’s feed rice to the dog.

Oh, I’m sorry my mom yelled in front of you. She thinks the dogs should starve or something.

Apparently my parental figures are telling me this party is over. I disagree. Come, this way. Let’s hide behind the curtain. They will never find us there.

Oh, you are leaving now? I didn’t even notice. My mom is making me say goodbye. So I guess, goodbye?

Well you’ll have to excuse me. I have to go now put a tutu on the dog.

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If you enjoyed this, you might also like: When Family Yoga with Your Spirited Toddler Goes Very, Very Wrong

 

 

This is why I don’t clean.

That time you swept and mopped your entire (tile) house from stem to stern and your toddler proceeded to spill the bucket of dirty water on said clean floors. And an hour later scattered the entire contents of a salt shaker around the house. And then peed on the bathroom floor for good measure.

Ahhh, normalcy is restored.