Squirrels, diiiiiings and a cause for celebration! 

Today has been melancholy. Blah. So MONDAY-ish. Maybe it was the return to work after a great day at the beach with dear friends who were visiting from out-of-state. Maybe it was the post-deathversary-grief. (Grief, after all, is the gift that keeps on giving.) Maybe it was that first thing this morning what did I see but the darn tootin’ squirrel scaling my bird feeder. (Well, I showed him. I sprayed more PAM on the pole. Yes, cooking spray. Try to scale that pole now buddy.)

So yeah. Bummer-ville today. But then this afternoon I hear my favorite little diiiiiiinnnnng –that is the noise on my phone when someone likes a post on my blog! It is like a warm-fuzzy snuggle-hug every time I hear it!

It turns out that WordPress was notifying me for a different reason–this popped up!


IT IS MY SECOND WORDPRESS ANNIVERSARY! Ok where is my cotton you guys??

TWO YEARS. Ahh the memories. But wait–I’ve only been posting since November 18th, 2015. What gives?

Remember how I told the story about how on the first deathversary I went to a beach and waxed poetic and got bit by bugs and angry at life and then had an epiphony that I should start this blog?? That day was two years ago to this day! I hit publish – but the blog was secret so nobody saw it.

I continued to write privately for one full year. 

And then, last November...I published it. It took one year plus exactly TWO more months. Baby steps!

Anyway, I love that now on the day after the anniversary of my mom’s passing I have a wordpressversary to ding and cheer me up. 

Thanks for reading, friends. For all the dinnnngs and comments and love. 

~Sarah

  

 
 

 

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Redwood Ecosystems and Life After Death

Remembering my beautiful mom
today. I continue to draw sustenance from her love.

In the redwood ecosystem, buds for future trees are contained in pods called burls, tough brown knobs that cling to the bark of the mother tree. When the mother tree is logged, blown over, or destroyed by fire –when, in other words, she dies – the trauma stimulates the burls growth hormones. The seeds release and trees sprout around her, creating the circle of daughters. The daughter trees grow by absorbing the sunlight their mother cedes to them when she dies. And they get the moisture and nutrients their need from their mother’s root system, which remains intact underground even after her leaves die. Although the daughters exist independently of their mother above ground, they continue to draw sustenance from her underneath.

-Hope Edelman, Motherless Daughters

Take time to remember

End of the Beginning by James Northrup

Someone said we begin to die
the minute we’re born.
Death is a part of life.
Who knows why the Creator
thins the herd.
Another old saying says
we must all be prepared
to give up those we love
or die first.
Take time to mourn.
Take time to remember.
Everything happens in cycles.
The pain you feel was once
balanced by someone’s joy
when that baby was born.
The loss you feel today
will be replaced by good
long-lasting memories.
Is there a message here? Yea,
treat others like this
is your last day above ground.

James Northrup 1943-2016

(artwork my own- full image can be viewed here and was inspired by this post.)

Why I Started this Blog

I thought I’d take a moment to welcome you and to share a little bit about why I started Mourning Dove Motherhood.

The real reason sounds slightly crazy, but it is the truth, and I’m a truth-teller. So here it is.

The seeds of this blog came about on the first anniversary of losing my mom (aka “Deathversary”). In typical fashion, I overthought the day and ended up having a slightly hilarious time attempting to mourn my mother on the stinking beaches of sanibel island.

I wanted to make grand sense of it all. Why this suffering. Why this loss? It sure sucked and I was tired of it, damnit!

Well, the universe/aka my dead mother/aka the oneness of the allness responded to me (I warned you it gets weird) and basically was all, “Yes this all sucks and you can be sad but get it TOGETHER WOMAN. You need to write. Write like your life depends on it. Sit. Down. And. Write.”

So I sat down and wrote. (I mean, after all my begging for answers, I wasn’t about to ignore the all-powerful-universe’s advice.)

I drafted dozens of posts on an unpublished blog with no name. I wanted to see exactly what I was going to write about before I put it out into the world.

Well, it turns out I have a lot to say about motherhood and a lot to say about the loss of my mom. A lot of it is funny. Some of it is sad. All of it heals me.

As far as the name of the blog is concerned,  it is a result of my close encounters with a mourning dove, which then led me to read about the symbolism of mourning doves, which made me realize that mourning doves perfectly encapsulate what this blog is about: motherhood and hope after loss.

Hope after loss. Oh yes, and we can’t forget the toddler who pees in the dog bowl. She shows up a lot. She is a feisty, hilarious, loving child and she is constant fodder for my writing.

Welcome and I look forward to sharing with you. (You and the universe, that is.)

P.s. I’m glad you are here. If you are anything like me and spend more time on Facebook than anywhere else, feel free to like the Facebook page to see all the upcoming posts!