We are in between places

Can you feel it? A pause between old and new, about to leap, about to step into a new era? No longer in the old world but not quite fully embracing the new. (Though it is here!)

Our beautiful planet and universe cycles onward, one era coming to an end as another just beginning.

The end of an epoch of pain and separation. A world of falsity, of masks, of programming that in every way was designed for us to stray from the truth of who we are for real. A paradigm that was rooted in separateness and lack, an “upside-down world” as I’ve been told in meditation! A place that says we are never enough and must find love outside ourselves…

We are being asked to leap into the new! A world of unity. A world that celebrates what we can do with a unified heart. A world that honors the uniqueness of all the creations – including you – but never at the expense of the whole. An era of remembering who we really are – love, the daughter and sons of source – and divine co-creators in this beautiful adventure of life.

It may feel scary — the unknown can be a scary place. But we have nothing to fear. We know how to do this – it’s in our DNA. In fact, we were born for this.

While I tend to be someone who embraces change with gusto, I’ve certainly had times where unknown freaked me out. In my spiritual path I’ve had to face the grief that comes with the shedding of the old — even when the old stink, stank, stunk! Still had to grieve it. Still felt a little sad parting with my old, dysfunctional bits. But ultimately it was worth it, every single damn time. And as many times I can remember when the new was scary, I can also recall sooooo many times when leaps into the void delivered amazing fantastical gifts. Leaps I wouldn’t regret in a million years.

When things get hard and even feel a little scary, remember the times in your own life when leaping into the unknown ultimately paid off.

You can do it. We can do it, together.

Bringing order to chaos

As the feminine energy rises, anything distorted in our lives will be thrown into most obvious chaos. The call is for us to heal the distortion and bring her back into balance in ourselves. The outer will follow.

My own tendency when life is thrown into chaos–and it’s happened plenty of times, 2018 being a particularly doozy–is to desperately cling to that outer world falling apart and try to “fix it.” Speaking of 2018, I remember a desperate phone call that year to my spiritual mother explaining the SEVERE anxiety my then five-year-old was experiencing. She said, mijita, your daughter is feeling you. She’s feeling your pain. DAMN. No mother wants to hear that they are the cause of their child’s suffering, and yet don’t you know that she was correct. I did some intense inner work, healing, transmuting and sure enough my daughter responded in kind. The anxiety practically disappeared over night.

Patriarchy has told us that the way to resolving any conflict is through the outside, but the feminine ways teach us to go inward and then bring those truths out. Our world is in chaos because humans are in chaos. As we each do our work we’ll create a ripple that brings alignment back to ourselves and our communities.

It’s probably not completely doomed!

“It is probably not completely fucked and doomed. At worst, it’s only slightly fucked and doomed.”  Mantra by *Sam Lamott (@samlamott) (*Offspring of one of my favorite writers, Anne Lamott!)

Is it me, or does the world feel a little bit chaotic lately? Pretty sure that this week we moved up a notch from You Gotta be Kidding Me to This is Getting Pretty Bonkers.

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Chaos galore. We’ve got hurricanes!! 3,000 dead people miraculously coming back to life from said hurricanes!! Taking money from the people who help during hurricanes so we can detain more children! (Although…if we can bring the dead back to life, maybe we don’t need FEMA??)

It’s all got me thinking: What do we do with chaos? That is, other than respond with fear. (Or booking a one-way flight directly to Justin-Trudeau-land.) 

All I know is that I have a predictable pattern I use when the latest crazy drops from the heavens and into my news feed.  And–because you’ll notice one of the below steps is writing (HA!)–I’m gonna write about it and share with you

Let’s call it, Sarah’s Seven Steps™ to Responding to the Chaos: (fictional trademark and everything.)

  1. Denial. Muttering over and over How is this HAPPENING? This can’t be happening! 
  2. ALL-CAPS STAGE. (AKA seeking validation from those who see it the way you do.) Post to facebook with crazy emoji faces that basically scream “OMG GUYS DO YOU SEE  THIS IS?!” *Yes they do unless they don’t and in that case your article won’t make them “see” it.  (Not that I heed this advice, I do this ALL THE TIME. See the all caps??!)
  3. Fight or Flight.  Responding with, “I’ve gotta do something! There are kids in cages! “OR,“Nope nope nope. Can’t deal with the crazy today! Gonna binge watch Making-It.” 
  4. Grapple with existential angst. Chocolate helps. So does talking aloud to beagles. 
  5. Surrender. Sweet, sweet surrender. You know, facing the feelings under it all. Having a good cry about the children. Discovering that you feel a lot better after facing the feels.
  6. Magic! Transmuting/alchemizing the pain. (Which auto correct wants to change to “Schematizing” – sure that works too.)  You feel the feels, you eat the chocolate…now what? For me, I transmute the pain through art or writing. I take the pain and turn it into joy. It’s basically magic.
  7. Repeat.  Again and again and again. The world is at bonkers-level crazy after all. And maybe bit by bit…our creations of joy build a beautiful new world out of the chaos.

THAT’S ALL I GOT. (OH: and vote in the midterms. Do that too! Register to vote and/or request your vote-by-mail if you haven’t yet!)

What about you? How do you cope with the crazy? Did I miss any steps? What level comes next you think?

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A slow return to normal

I’m having a hard time writing which makes no sense to me. Here I sit, in my home, in air conditioning (WE HAVE POWER!!) with precious alone time, of which I had very little during the Irma experience. (And it was an experience.)

And yet. I don’t know what I want to say.

Do I want to write about how grateful I am for safe drinking water, cool air and hot food? (Very.)

Do I want to write about but there for the grace of God go I?

Do I want to write about how quickly chaos can return to normal but normal doesn’t quite feel right after the chaos? (But, but, did you just SEE what happened? Do you see what is still happening?)

Do I want to write about how my understanding of climate change and fossil fuel dependency shifted from a knowing of the head to the knowing of the heart? 

Do I want to write about community and love and civility in the midst of crisis?

I want to write about all the things but right now can’t seem to articulate any of them. The words will come. For now, I leave you with pictures from my walk yesterday with the dogs–the first “normal” walk since Irma came a knockin’, but as you can see from the pictures, things are still anything but normal.

(Photos taken 9/19/17:)

The non-native shrubs lining our neighborhood did not fare well

trees down every where you look

So many trees uprooted (and people, too)

A lot of devastation at the lake near our home. The lake is still flooded (the water in front should not be there). We have seen record-breaking rainfall this year.

There is a little blue heron in there. Can you find it?

Curbs lined with debris for pickup.