3:01 a.m.
4-year old: “Maaaaaaaah-meeee, it’s time to watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!! Time to make the caaaaaaaaawwwwfeeeeee!”
me: “No, it’s definitely not. Go back to sleep.”

4:22 a.m.
4YO: “It’s getting light out!”
Me: “No, it’s definitely not. Go back to sleep.”
4:48 a.m.
4YO: “Mommy, how do bats see in the dark?”
Me: “I don’t know. Go back to sleep.” (Meanwhile, thinks to self, hmm, bats have poor vision right? But they echolocate. . . why am I thinking about this.)
4YO: “I’ll ask daddy!” (runs to daddy, who wisely retreated to the guest bed to avoid this nonsense.)

4:49 a.m.
4YO: “THEY ECKA-LOKAY!”
Me: “Yes, echolocation. Go back to sleep.”
6:22 a.m.
4YO: (Snoring.)
Me: (Snoring)
7:01 a.m.
4YO: “Mommy it’s light out! Time for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!”
Me: “Time to make the caaaawwww-feeee.” (Yawn.)
How did your child’s chocolate hangover go? What’s that, you wisely did not let your youngster consume copious amounts of chocolate late in the day?? *All hail your wise parenting choices!*